37

I’ve been meaning to write a post for ages about how fucking terrifying turning 37 is and how the magnitude of it has been hard to comprehend and left me with a slightly sicky feeling…and then life happened and I had a really busy and super fun few weeks and by the time my Birthday actually arrived, my blood-alcohol ratio was so off kilter and I was so excited about seeing lots of the people I love that the moment passed.

Anyway. I am now 37 and one day and very hungover and, to my great surprise, I’m actually ok with it. At the moment. I feel a million miles away from where I was this time last year when I couldn’t really sense a future and it felt like I was sort of watching life pass me by; and, if there’s one thing that my last few months of being 36 taught me, it is that life can change really fast and you never know what’s coming round the corner. Which can sometimes be wonderful.

So, I’d like to take this into my 37th year, even though – and because I still haven’t quite grown out of my various neuroticisms – I am a little unsettled by how positive and hopeful I’m currently feeling. I hope that I keep putting myself into new situations and doing things that surprise me. I hope that I remember that change can be absolutely amazing – once you’ve got over the initial hurdle. And I hope that I remember that this is all independent of age – cos you can change your life whenever you decide that you’re ready to.

Issa 1

 

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